17:35 – Sheepy’s opening caption and music.
17:40 – Thames TV morning start-up music.
17:45 – Only When I Laugh – S04E07 – The Reunion – A sitcom made by Yorkshire Television for ITV, written by Eric Chappell (Rising Damp, Home to Roost). It stars Christopher Strauli as Norman, a rather naive middle-class man who is admitted to a hospital ward and finds that he is sharing it with a working-class layabout called Figgis (James Bolam) and an upper-class hypochondriac called Archie (Peter Bowles). All three of them cause headaches for the hospital staff, led by Richard Wilson with Derrick Branche. This week, in the last-ever episode, the patients are discharged on the same day – somewhat reluctantly given their lengths of stay – and decide to have a reunion the same evening in a restaurant. By chance Dr Thorpe is there with Hilary, who is emphatically not his wife, and when Thorpe goes to make a phone call, Glover, seeing her alone, moves in… First broadcast on Thu 16th Dec 1982 by ITV.
18:10 – Michael Bentine’s Potty Time S03E02 – China / Jason and the Argonauts – a British children’s TV show, written by and starring Michael Bentine, and directed and produced by Leon Thau for Thames Television. This week, built centuries ago, the Great Wall of China still excites the imagination. Michael Bentine and his Potty friends show us why this mighty construction was necessary. We then enter the world of classical mythology to find out why Jason and his Argonauts fought the fiercesome Hydra and the Armed Skeletons to win the Golden Fleece. First broadcast on Tue 11th Jan 1977 by ITV. Usual content warnings apply, I imagine.
18:33 – The Gemini Factor S01E04 – The Ring – a 1987 six-part children’s serial starring Louisa Haigh and Charlie Creed-Miles, written by Paula Milne, directed by Renny Rye, and produced by Sheila Kinany for Thames TV. A twin brother and sister separated at birth. Two halves forming the Yin and Yang. Two telepathic minds. An ancient clock tower. A mystery to keep the mind alert. This week… well the series is obscure enough to have no Wiki page and a fairly minimal IMDb presence, so your guess is as good as mine! First broadcast on Mon 23rd Nov 1987 by ITV.
18:58 – Clangers (New CBeebies Version) S01E15 – The Metal Bug – the 2010s reboot of the famous early-1970s Oliver Postgate / Peter Firmin stop-motion children’s television series about a family of mouse-like creatures who live on, and inside, a small moon-like planet. This week, Small Clanger finds a strange ball while out fishing in space. No-one knows what it is, so Major decides to put it on a shelf in his workshop. But a little while later he finds it in two hollow pieces on the ground – and the Soup Dragon discovers that something has been eating the copper trees. Could the two events be connected? First broadcast on Fri 3rd Jul 2015 at 5.30pm by CBeebies.
19:10 – Star Trek (The Original Series) S03E01 – Spock’s Brain – This week, in the first of the third and last series, the crew of the Enterprise pursue a mysterious woman who has abducted Spock’s brain. They have just hours to locate it and restore it before Spock’s body dies. First broadcast in the USA on Fri 20th Sept 1968 by NBC, in the 10pm so-called “death slot”. This episode is widely regarded as the worst episode of the series, although personally I’d dispute that: while indeed utterly ridiculous, it’s rarely boring and is good campy fun. I can think of others I’d avoid more than this.
20:00 – Tales of the Unexpected S01E08 – A Dip in the Pool – a British television series that aired between 1979 and 1988. Each episode told a story, often with sinister and wryly comedic undertones, with an unexpected twist ending. Every episode of series one, eight episodes of series two, and one episode of series three were based on short stories by Roald Dahl, who provided introductions for the first two series. This week, an American gambler on a trans-Atlantic liner goes into the pool that bets on how far ship sails each day. Expecting bad weather, he bets a low distance, but then the weather fines up. He must come up with a plan to slow the ship down. First broadcast on Sat 12th May 1979 by ITV. Featuring Michael Troughton.
20:25 – Special Branch S03E05 – Polonaise – After a two-and-a-half-year break (Nov 1970 – Apr 1973) on original transmission, this show returned in a completely revamped form, now made by Euston Films in their first-ever production for Thames TV. It now stars George Sewell as DCI Alan Craven, with support from an on-off combination of Roger Rowland as DS Bill North and Patrick Mower as DCI Tom Haggerty. This week, Special Branch officers North and Craven are asked to protect a former Nazi collaborator. Although they have contempt for the man and their assignment, they must shield him from those who remember his old war crimes. First broadcast on Wed 2nd May 1973 by ITV. This episode features Richard “Colonel Kurt von Strohm from ‘Allo ‘Allo” Marner, André “Quatermass in the TV Pit” Morell, George “Thunderball / Callan / Doctor Who / Colditz” Pravda, and @the’s favourite quasi-rhyming actor Bernard “Marcus Scarman / Lytton’s Editor” Archard.
21:17 – Eurotrash S06E04 – The legendary late-night magazine show starring Antoine de Caunes and Jean-Paul Gaultier, exploring unusual and bizarre topics from Europe and around the world. This week, we have Christiane Schollmeyer: Vibrator Tester, Andreas Hoff: S&M Locksmith, Sit On Me, Beatrice Dalle, Jean-Paul Goude, Reykjavik’s Penis Museum, Jean Rollin: King of the Vampires, Supermodel Shopping: Emma Sjoberg, Rudolph Moshammer. First broadcast on Fri 3rd May 1996 by Channel 4.
21:41 – The Persuaders! E02(P06)/24 – The Gold Napoleon – A British action comedy television series starring Tony Curtis and Roger Moore, produced by ITC Entertainment. It was filmed in Britain, France, and Italy between May 1970 and June 1971. The series’ synth-laden theme music was composed by John Barry. The Persuaders are two equally-matched men from different backgrounds who reluctantly team together to solve cases that the police and the courts cannot. This week: an attempt to assassinate an art student at the Côte d’Azur airport lead Brett and Danny to a syndicate smuggling gold in the form of counterfeit coins. First broadcast on Fri 24th Sep 1971 by ITV. Featuring Susan George and Alfred Marks. The DVDs have the episodes in (P)roduction Order, however after some thought and research I’ve decided to show them in their original LWT broadcast order (which matches IMDb & Wikipedia). Some ITV regions varied the date and order (Granada and Anglia, for example, transmitted a day earlier).
22:31 – Girls on Top S02E02 – Big Snogs – a British sitcom, broadcast on ITV in 1985 & 1986, made by Allan McKeown’s Witzend Productions for Central Independent Television. It starred Dawn French, Jennifer Saunders, Ruby Wax and Tracey Ullman (S1 only) with Joan Greenwood. It was written by French, Saunders and Wax, with additional material for two episodes written by Ullman. It was produced & directed by Paul Jackson (S1) and Ed Bye (S2). Both theme and incidental music were written and perforned by Chris Difford & Glenn Tillbrook. This week, Amanda’s feminist front takes a holiday when her home electrical repairs class is taken by substitute teacher Tom. First broadcast on Thu 6th Nov 1986 at 9.00pm by ITV. Featuring Hugh Laurie.
22:56 – Agony S03E02 – Arrivals and Departures – An ITV sitcom that aired from 1979 to 1981. Made by London Weekend Television, it stars Maureen Lipman as Jane Lucas who has a successful career as an agony aunt but whose own personal life is a shambles. It was created by Len Richmond and real-life agony aunt Anna Raeburn, both of whom wrote all of the first series. The second and third series were written by Stan Hey and Andrew Nickolds. This week, being unemployed is making Michael seriously depressed and when Jane goes to visit him she discovers she may be too late to help him out. First broadcast on Sun 25th Jan 1981 by ITV. Featuring Beryl Reid.
23:21 – Fanny Hill E02/02 – a two-part BBC adaptation of John Cleland’s controversial 1748 novel Fanny Hill, written by Andrew Davies and directed by James Hawes. This is the first television adaptation of the novel. It tells the story of a young country girl (Rebecca Night) who is lured into prostitution in 18th-century London. This week (SPOILERS!): with Charles gone, Fanny becomes the kept mistress of the older but attractive Mr H, a man from a wealthy family who gives her a good lifestyle but is extremely possessive. He wants her love but she still pines for Charles and so, to punish her, he has sex with the maid. In retaliation Fanny allows frustrated young footman William to pleasure her but Mr H catches them and leaves Fanny. She then gets work with Mrs Cole, a rival to Mrs Jones, whose bordello is at the back of an apparently respectable hat shop [HAH, I knew it!]. By now an experienced prostitute, Fanny is Mrs Cole’s beautiful star attraction, introducing the sons of wealthy patrons to the joys of sex and breaking hearts on the way. But Mrs Cole is closed down and Fanny is on the streets. Fortunately she rescues elderly Mr Goodyear from footpads and he takes her in, treating her as a daughter rather than a lover and leaving her his fortune when he dies. Fanny decides to return home, but on the way her carriage is stopped by a young man on horseback. Could this be her beloved Charles, whom she had presumed lost at sea? First broadcast on Mon 29th Oct 2007 by BBC4.
00:20 – Closedown music.
00:25 – Closedown.